I’m an old internet veteran. Have been part of different communities, newsgroups and been making homepages since the dawn of the internet and now I’m an experienced blogger. This blog is only one of several. I’ve been having a really difficult time in RL. I got bullied at work, burned out, was cheated on payment from my old job, on sick leave for deep depression – these are only a few of the things that happened to me. In the end I got help and started to live again after a couple of years of not being able to do anything.
I’d been struggling at work for a long time, so one of the first things I did was to contact my old friends, both in RL and online. I hadn’t been paying attention to anyone and anything for ages. Some of them had disappeared during this time but the true ones were still there. Another thing I did was to join a few new communities. Some of the old ones I’d been part of wasn’t around anymore. That’s what happens on the internet. Persons and homepages come and go. One of the communities I joined was SL Universe. At first it seemed to be a very good community, friendly, fun and I thought I found friends there. I’d been part of lots of communities and on the surface it seemed one of the good ones.
But more and more I found out that the community consists of a small group of people who had been friends for a long time. They were surrounded by a big group of people applauding whatever they did. I admit there are a few truly good persons there, but sadly none of the ones I thought were my friends. If they are, they might be afraid to speak up or they will lose their place in the community.
What at first glance seemed like a good place to be while recovering from the recent events in RL turned out to be a small hell. If anyone wants to try joining this community, these are a few tips on how to get on there.
1) If you are part of a minority don’t ever admit it. They will smell blood and start to hover close to you. There will be lots of things about which you’re not even allowed to have views.
2) Don’t try to help anyone. The in crowd can’t do anything wrong, so there’s no use trying to help them. And if you try to help anyone else, you’ll be attacked.
3) If the in crowd decides you said something, don’t try to tell them otherwise. I know it’s a community and there will be evidence of what you said, but no one will read that anyway. Just keep quiet. If you want to stay, just admit you said what you didn’t say.
4) There are only a few things you’re allowed to post when you’re not part of the in crowd. Slutty pics of yourself in RL or SL are always good. Icons of smileys having sex is another one. Whate you post doesn’t have to make sense, the opposite is generally preferable.
5) Don’t care about anyone or anything, unless you are part of the in crowd. Then no rules apply except if you’re too close to the owner of the community.
6) Don’t ever admit you’re not into BDSM if you aren’t. If you accidentally do, whatever you say will be considered snarky. And if you are into BDSM, then make sure you’re a sub, that’s the only thing that is allowed if you’re not part of the in crowd.
7) If you are gay, then you’re more likely to be welcomed into this community. If you’re not, then the best thing you can do is to tell the in crowd how sexy they are, preferably those of the same gender as you.
8 ) If you want to post something, make sure you have read everything posted from the start of the community. It’s considered a crime to post something that has been posted before. Unless, yes, you guessed it, you’re part of the in crowd.
9) Don’t admit you’re not American, British might be ok, but everything else is considered ‘foreign’ and should be treated accordingly. No one will understand you and movies from your country are considered weird.
10) Don’t try to post anything there when you’re feeling down, unless you’re part of the in crowd, they thrive on weakness and will want to bite your head off.
11) Last, but not the least, don’t think that you’ll find friends there. Persons you have laughed with for weeks can suddenly stab you in the back if the in crowd decides it the proper thing to do, or simply start to ignore you.
What I experienced at SLU was new to me. I have never in all my years online seen this and I hope I never will again. I am not sad to have tried be part of this community since I’ve learned a lot about human nature. I’m more puzzled than anything else. What goes on there isn’t unique to the internet or to RL, but at SLU you’ll find it in a more pure form. The only thing I regret is thinking that I had found friends there. I feel stupid to have believed in them.
It was for them I got back that last time. Thought they were worth fighting my way back there. And even though I hate to admit it to myself, I do miss some of them. Miss them a lot.